Motherhood makes the good in life so much better. But it also makes the lows so much worse.
When you are on top of everything and have an amazing day you feel like SUPERWOMAN. Seriously. I can do it! I'm a hot working Momma and I can do anything!
But when something goes wrong it ruins EVERYTHING. Your entire day (sometimes week!) is crushed. I think it is so enhanced because you can't just take care of yourself. Before kids, if I had a tough day at work I could go for a long run or meet Tom for a glass of wine or go to bed super early to end the day and start over. You can't do that with kids. You need to plan every second of the day and that long run or quiet time with the husband doesn't always fit where and when you need it.
This became evident to me again over the last 2 weeks. Last week was one of those worst of times weeks. Work was terrible; deadlines were missed, heated conversations were had, pumping time was cut to only once per day (the frozen milk supply surely took a hit!), lots of soul searching was conducted and mommy guilt was felt.
It sucked.
And when work sucks, home tends to suck. I am distracted. And when I'm distracted the laundry piles up. The bathrooms begin growing things. The dust balls take over. Luke has no clean underwear. We run out of bread. And juice boxes.
I swear the kids sense it too. Adam was extra fussy. Waking up at night.
Luke was super hyper and needing lots of attention.
Tom was stressed because I was stressed. He wanted to help but I couldn't articulate what I needed him to do.
Then we had a wonderful weekend.
Lots of family time.
Lots of snuggles on the couch.
And things felt better.
And today is a Best of Times kind of day.
Deadlines have been met, pumping is back on track. House is clean (well things aren't growing anymore...). Boys are super happy.
I feel on top of it again.
So I'm memorializing it.
When I have a Worst of Times week I can read this and remember that the Best of Times is right around the corner.
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